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age·ism
/ˈājˌizəm/
noun
prejudice or discrimination on the grounds of a person’s age.

Let’s be honest, there is no better to way to describe ageism but as plain ugly, and for many engaged in sex work, they too are no strangers to the ageist attitudes of those ugly enough to inflict it.

Sex work is complex delicate work that nurtures the souls of those that seek out the services of providers gracious enough to that provide what they need. A delicate nurturing of mind, body, and soul, so it’s no wonder that those who become attached to their provider, stick with them for a very long time. Over the course of that relationship factors that usually dictate otherwise are obvious, retirement, an address change to a new city or location, and in many circumstances, even death. Just to name a few.

Sex work is an industry that has nurtured a youthful appearance towards sex and sexuality, in favour of overlooking the fact, the population ages. That sex is only for and had by the physically young, which begs the question; what of the young at heart, mind, and soul? Bonds between a client and provider are forged in steel and for those that are willing to go that extra mile, these bonds can be everlasting.

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A playful flirt and a giggle, that’s what’s sexy this week.

Human interaction is super important, interaction of the positive kind. Forget the stalkers, sleazebags, and despicable low-lifes who truly only deserve a baseball bat upside the head for a little tune-up. No I’m talking about the attention from playful fun when one is out and about, that comes from innocent friendliness.

Innocent is the key word here, since many interpret these actions as seduction. Misinterpretations made by people who don’t have the skills to know the difference, as it shouldn’t take a rocket scientist to figure that out.

Over a coffee with my girlfriend Brit, a sassy buxom blonde, I sat and listened as she told me of her exploits while on her last holiday. Exploits I realized, are not far off from my own when I’m out in the world. What we also agreed on was the fun that came from a playful compliment, or a flirt. Fun that we both knew wasn’t going to go anywhere except validation as the people we are. Gregarious, life loving gals, who dress-up for every occasion including a trip to the laundry room!

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The art of casual conversation with a stranger, that’s what’s sexy this week.

Actually, it’s more like the lost art of casual conversation, and all a person needs to do is look around themselves once they’ve unglued their faces from their phones. Those little devices we’ve wired ourselves to the world with, the electronic annoyance that has become for many, a buffer from actual connection to the land of the living.

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During a recent writing exercise for a performance project in which I was involved, each of us was asked to write about our biggest fear. Not much, does scare me as I’ve learned to be strong, but sometimes that little bug can get under your skin and stay there forever. Like everyone else on the planet, I’m a person to, with emotions and feelings and my steely cold reserve is just my defence mechanism of a, believe it or not, painfully shy person.

This is mine, this is what I wrote.

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The Pretty little leaf is what’s sexy this week!

There I was, shit, showered and shaved, dressed and ready for the day, over my morning anxiety with my “kick ass” attitude dialed in at a level ten as I went out the door to face the day. My clothes perfectly coordinated of complimentary colours, matching jewelry, makeup applied with the precision of surgeon, and my hair all neatly hot-rollered and set. I was ready! With chin held high, shoulders back, tits out, and stomach in, I walked to the bus stop to patiently wait with all the other morning riders.

On the bus, I made myself comfortable for the 15 minute ride to the skytrain reading the morning paper as we rode over the bumps and potholes that dotted the downtown streets of beautiful Vancouver; the city I call home. The bus’s arrival at the skytrain always greats me with a certain amount of irony, its the skytrain, but at this juncture it runs underground. It always gives me a brief moment of contemplation as I descend to the train’s platform quietly crop dusting as I make my way deeper into the ground.

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Well here you have it, two companies competing for your sales of providing you with the ability of long distance kisses for your loved ones in far off places.

I’m not sure who came up with the idea first, and I don’t care, it’s the idea I love. First is Lovotics  with an interesting little selection of devices you can hook up to your computer and send kisses from afar to afar. In their words;

“Kissenger is an application of Lovotics. Kissenger system consists of a pair of robots to transfer kiss over distance.

Kissenger provides a novel way of transferring a kiss through interactive digital media. It provides a physical interface enabling kiss communication for several applications facilitating intimate human tele-presence with the real and virtual worlds.
Kissing is a very important mode of human communication that involves joining lips in order to express many deep felt positive emotions such as affection, respect, greeting, farewell, good luck, romantic affection or sexual desire. Apart from the surface level enjoyment humans have by kissing, it also plays a crucial biologically motivated role in allowing prospective mates to smell and taste each other’s pheromones for detecting compatibility.
With the aid of digital communication media and advanced robotic technology, the system takes the form of an artificial mouth that provides the convincing properties of the real kiss.” (more…)

Stupid, idiot, asshole, phobic, moronic, obtuse, shallow, unintellectual, witless, all other words used to describe the word ignorant. A word I much rather prefer to use because it so blatantly, and quite simply says it in one word, IGNORANT! Unfortunately there are a lot of people on the planet that are just that, nothing more, nothing less, just ignorant. Ignorant of those in society that are different from themselves, different, a quality that should be celebrated, coveted, cherished and adored, difference, and that’s what’s sexy this week.

Life isn’t easy for those that are different, trust me I know, I’m faced with adversity each and every day of my life. For the most part I am fairly resilient and can shrug it off, but when someone is in your face with words that cut deeper than a knife, that then leads to actions of a negative kind, it’s hard to turn and walk away.

For me as a woman who just so happens to be transsexual, I love that I am different, and I never thought I would. I was always trying to blend in with the crowd and fade away. However, it didn’t take me long to understand that being out, loud, and proud, was, and is where it’s at!

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It’s not hard to understand why we as human beings are so frustrated with today’s society of go go go at 100/kmh into a brick wall. We are slowly being programmed into believing we have to go faster and faster to get things done, things we don’t even remember or at many times know why we even are doing them!

To top it all off, everything is slowly becoming automated making the need for human beings to do the work obsolete! More people with less jobs to do because of automation. How does that work? Take for instance recorded messages, press 1 for complaints, press 2 for grief, press 3 for just because we want to piss you off, press 4 to blow up this recording! Not hard to understand why most press 0 to bypass it all to get to a “real” person.

Along with this we are losing our ability to properly communicate with people when we are not on the phone, out in the actual world doing things, things like living. When we are communicating it is in the form of short quick vocal bursts with no eye contact being made, always or usually looking off into space or down at the ground. Why? Who knows, my suggestion is to look up, face whoever it is and look into those eyes. Making eye contact, that’s what’s sexy this week. (more…)

There you are walking down the street minding your own business, when suddenly a complete stranger says to you,

“I just wanted to tell you, that you look really nice!”

Catching you completely off guard!

What do you do, ignore it, keep on going, politely smile, or nothing at all? I’ll tell you, you stop and politely acknowledge the praise from a stranger that has been graciously presented your way, and praise from a stranger is what’s sexy this week.

Provided it is praise that is not with an ulterior motive of which is pretty damned easy to determine if your not an idiot, or praise which may be and warranted or wanted, it’s still praise that should be warmly and most graciously accepted! (more…)

Up for a few words of encouragement?

I am, we all know that life has it’s up’s and down’s and we do whatever it is to cope on a daily basis. For me it boils down to a few things, confidence and courage, courage to take what life has to offer, and the confidence to enjoy what it has to offer.

Cause ain’t life grand?

It surely is, and I question why more folks aren’t enjoying what it has to offer, stopping to smell the roses, seize the day, take the reigns, shit and get off the pot, or quite simply TAKE LIFE BY THE BALLS! Yes that’s it, TAKE LIFE BY THE BALLS and have a great time of it.

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